Secret Love Letters

I used to write poems, eventually I would end up deleting them because i felt its corny. Big regrets, it's always great to look back at the past. Though most of the time, I'm teasing myself how stupid I was before, reading them is a good recapitulation on how I improve on handling things. Though sound unbelievable, I would say that I'm more emotionally mature now. A lot of things can go bad and can make us blue, I am learning to Master my Emotions!

If you'll excuse me, allow me to cam whore even just a little. Just great! I wasn't able to delete it all. Here are some of what I have written.

BILLET DOUX
I know when there's something special and when there's not.
I know he is special but we have no special knot.
We are plain friends, Very good in fact.
I would want to have that status for now and for tomorrow.
I admit, there are times that i get jealous but nothing serious.
I am very happy to see him happy.
Having him as a friend is more than too much.

FACES AND FECES
Now, there's no sense of keeping that secret,
I want to take this out of my chest...
If your still too weak to keep it, then I'm strong enough to tell them the truth.
There's no point of hiding, well it seems like you don't care anymore anyway.
So why bother if I'll tell them our little secret, right?
Well, they are part of the story in the first place.
Don't worry, i won't put dirt in your name, in your sacred name.
Asking why do i have to share it?
People may learn something about our story.
Entertainment or lessons maybe,
About lies, trust and how life can be interestingly played,
just the way you did.

*aka I'm keeping a secret, because you're too weak to keep it. This was written for a friends who sort of deleted me their lives. What hurts was that, when they would express how important you are for them and then suddenly they go offline, idle until now. I have to totally overcome with this, I'm just wishing them happiness wherever in the world they maybe.

FINDING PETERPAN
Sometimes people do something than does not make sense at all.
Finding peter pan was not just a game.
Just so you know, I succeeded, and I found more that I ought to know.
I can't believe i'm gonna write this.
IT SUCKS!
Finding answers only leads me to find more questions.
Questions that does not really require answers.
ACCEPTANCE.will do.
and again, IT SUCKS!

*I could vividly remember how pissed I was. Good thing, I'm not having that heavy feeling anymore. Guess if we cant understand how things are, why bother understanding them There's always bigger and greater out there, so live that chaos behind. Smile and Move forward!